Here is something I want to do with my life: Wear a Major League Baseball uniform. But here's the thing, I am not very good at baseball (at least not good enough to play in the MLB). My one attribute to bring to the game is my knowledge, I know more about baseball than anyone (Yes, that is a challenge to anyone willing to question it). I would love to be a coach one day, for either a college or a high school team. I believe that would be a good life. But I aim to shoot higher. The one thing I know I can do, at any level of the game, is catch bullpens. For those who might not understand the phrase "catch bullpens," it is simply catching a pitcher warming up before or during a game before going in to pitch, or catching them on the side at practice to work on pitches or mechanics, or to just stay sharp. Many catchers hate it, some don't mind it, and very few love it. It depends on the day, but a lot of the time, I enjoy catching bullpens. Hey, call me crazy. The life of a catcher is not always so rewarding. We get beat up back there. We have all the protective gear, sure, but if you're lucky, the ball finds the gear only half of the time. Again, call me crazy, but I love the grind that catchers go through, I am willing to sacrifice my body for the good of the team.
The point is this: I want to catch bullpens for a career. I want to be a professional bullpen catcher. That would be the life, man, it really would. For starters, I would be able to travel around the country with first class service. Plus, when you do what you love, you never work a day in your life, and the salary does not matter too much. Speaking of, the salary of a MLB bullpen catcher is determined by the organization, public discussion of their salaries is considered taboo around the MLB, but I have seen as little a 20k, and up towards 150k. Pay me what you want, pay for my meals and living arrangements and put me to work. Aside from whatever they get paid in salary, they also get tipped well because most of the pitchers they catch are making seven figures, or more. Not to mention the per diem they receive for each day they have a road game, which is about 200 dollars.
The biggest perk to all of this, forget the traveling and the pay, would to be able to wake up everyday, go to the ballpark, and be able to put on a big league uniform. That has been the dream since day one, and it will be the dream until my last breath, unless, you know, I get there.
I wouldn't dare question your knowledge of the game. You've got it figured out and even if you don't acclaim the position of a professional pen catcher, you'll be a hell of a coach. You're right on board with the benefits of being a pen catcher in the show, sounds like a dream job. Best of luck to you in that pursuit. You've always been the man behind the dish, so why not take it all the way?
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